Allie got back from Calcutta with an arm full of saris and sacred poetry and an arsenal of stories involving one-eyed beggars. Oh yes, you better believe I am jealous. On the plus side, my Korean grandma has called distraught that my mother and I are not around, so I might be traveling to Korea in January. I am promised shopping trips to China if I am good. From what I hear among my delicious arthouse-fags-abroad, Korea is totally the new Japan. Allie spent most of the weekend showing us terrible movies like “D.E.B.S”, which feature an elite group of paramilitary-college-coeds who fight crimes in catholic school outfits. The movie would have been so-so if not for three key factors:
1) fantastic dialogue a la “clueless”
2) Jordana Brewester as the gorgeous lesbian super villain
3) Devon Aiko (sp?) the half british half Japanese supermodel with the most perfect legs in the world.
Wow, my posts are really all lesbianese lately, aren’t they? This is what happens when I run with the old skool vibrato crowd—everything is all about the lesbians. I ask for patience. I can’t help it if I love me my dykes.

Julia also got back from Oxford Sunday and wasn’t all that thrilled to be back in the United States. We were thrilled to have her back but I think we unwittingly gave her the cold shoulder because of her unapologetic refusal to follow anything close to a budget. She spent her money on haircuts, piercings, robes, musical programs, ice cream, and shoes—in essence, complete wastes of money on things that could have just as easily been purchased over here. We didn’t mind money on one-of-a-kind things, but haircuts? Cartilage piercings? You’re only in England a month! Show some self control! Then she was pouting at breakfast because we were making fun of her “you guys don’t understand” attitude (both Margaret and I have done the program, so we do understand), and then she burst out crying and now I feel terrible.

Ok, I’m going up to Chicago tomorrow, which means I’ll be in town the 3rd through the 6th, then I’m roadtripping to Montreal for a few days, then coming back trough the 14th or so. Is there anyone who would like to come with me to Montreal? Lakshmi already counted herself out—how about you Adele? The? Come on—who wants to keep me company so I don’t have to be the fifth wheel for my sister and her boyfriend?

PS—Stuart and Michelle DID break up. Now I have nothing to live for!