I’ve got things to talk about, namely the amazing bath of love that was Adele’s wedding, but I can’t get to it until I manage to catch up on my life. I’m not sure why I feel the need to do this, other than the fact that I live the most IMPORTANT LIFE THAT HAS EVER BEEN LIVED. By humans. And as such I have a responsibility to pass down my exploits to my posterity. So here, in one massive go, is what has happened in my VERY IMPORTANT life between May and October. Children of the future, be ready to be dazzled.
MAY
“You can't leave Kenneth! Who's going to help me tell white people apart?”-30 Rock
After I left Mark in Indiana, I came back to New York mid-May. The first thing I did was attend a Best Week Ever Party with the always awesome Anna “Mentor” O’Brien, where we met a few bloggers (one of whom sent us a box full of cookies), PC from the “I’m a Mac” ads, Paul F Tompkins (who told us about his role in “The Informant!”), and the dude with all the hats from “30 Rock.” Judah Friedlander. That’s it.
Towards the last week of May, Mark came to town to see if this was maybe a place he’d maybe think about living maybe. While he was spending the mornings sleeping and learning about the wonderful world of TV, I would go to cattle calls for my temp agency, where I would be paid $40 to sit in a room and see wait to see if anyone needed a temp for the day. While I never got called, I did a fantastic amount of Twittering, as all I could do to entertain myself was read New York magazine and tweet about the things that were going on in the city. I also got to read horrible things like the Brooklyn Rail. Sample line: “What is infidelity? The evergreen question vexed shaman and spouse alike well before facebook.” Epic fail indeed, Brooklyn Rail.
Mark and I visited the Museum of Arts and Design on May 28th. They had a few good pieces, particularly in the ceramics wing. One of my favorites was an artist who cut the patterns out of blue and white plates, then stacked them ontop of each other to create 3-dimensional pieces.
On May 28-29th I worked the massive Book Expo of America, helping a company called the Ripple Reader market their company to publishers and authors. Interestingly, I found the job through an old Hockaday alum I met on LinkedIn. The Book Expo was a lot of work, involved a huge amount of schmoozing, but I got paid in cash, so it wasn’t all bad.
Friday the 29th Nickd came into town, so we met up with him at the Congee Village near Chinatown. It was quite a little NU reunion, with good food and good conversation. Afterwards we got cupcakes from Sugar Sweet Sunshine and walked across the Williamsburg bridge to visit an upscale beer garden on Metropolitan Ave.
Saturday the 30th Mark and I went goth clubbing with Marsha. Marsha talked me into dancing on a stage, leading to me to a) trip and b) get kicked off by angry goth kids who wanted to throw a sub-par fashion show. Mark got pretty drunk, and had a nice altercation with the guards of the Holland Tunnel who kicked us out for “allegedly” trying to walk to New Jersey. Mark to officer: “you want to hold my hand and walk me to the curb?” Priceless.
Sunday after church Mark met up with me, Alexis, Veronica, and a few other kids to visit the Bang on a Can Festival in Battery Park (Specifically, the Winter Gardens. More specifically, an indoor mall). Ted Hearne's 'we didn't know' was beautiful and creepy. The Smith Quartet did a lovely abridged version of Gavin Bryars’ “the Sinking of the Titanic”. Which reminded me a lot of sophomore year in Mark’s dorm room, where we used to listen to that record. Jeppe Christensen played a series of coffee grinders, which was almost onto something, but not quite, and Moritz Eggert played an absurd piano piece with her feet and face. And also, some hands. And she chirped bird sounds The big draw, Tortoise, were lackluster and phoned in the performance.
JUNE
“A Rubik cube is equal to a drag queen in that they're both colorful, and I don't want to do it”
In order to make extra money during the slow summer months, I do basically anything I can for money. One of those things is late-night coding, where I take surveys and either a) pass them out to disgruntled Broadway crowds or b) analyze and code movie surveys into spread sheets which are sent to the film’s producer, director, and head of marketing. I brought Mark with me to a couple, since Mark was short on cash. One of the first we did together was on June 3rd: it was a hysterical little coming-of-age comedy called “Youth in Revolt.”
On June 4th, I took Mark to his first Broadway play, called “The Norman Conquest.” Great cast, unusual structure, funny, and very entertaining. The next night, I dragged him to the Met so we could see the New York City Ballet before the season ended. The performance was rather short: a Brahms Waltz (which was very, very traditional), and a Stravinsky piece called “Les Noces,” which was much more interesting. It was a piece based on a traditional Russian wedding, and the couple looks and dances quite awkwardly through out the ceremony. Then, in the last few bars, the couple goes to the bedchamber, and a single light falls on them, and they entwine their limbs together in the most simple, sensual, and sweet way possible. Very moving.
Continuing our Andrew WK “When it’s time to party we will party hard” attitude, the next day (Saturday, June 6th) I did coding for the Little Mermaid, then met Mark afterwards in Park Slope to see the Appleseed cast. We got some dinner at a cute little Indian restaurant, then went back to the show which was in an artsy bar called the Bell House (more like a saloon) with dark wood, old glass, and antlers. I finished Pride and Prejudice and Zombies while we were waiting for the Appleseed Cast to set up. Then…the most boring show of my entire life. Those guys couldn’t have looked less passionate if they were paid to. Which I guess they were. It became pretty clear why the band isn’t bigger then they are.
As far as work went, I did an interview with the star of an MTV show (“Sixteen and Pregnant”) and got a call from a recruiter, who told me I needed to revamp my website and get a new resume. So I spent June 9th-June 11th frantically trying to get both in order. Mark came up with an amazing design for the website, and basically coded the whole thing for me as a way of saying thanks for hosting him in NYC. The website (maryjonescopywriter.com) is gorgeous, and I couldn’t have done it without him. In the evening (June 9th), Mark and I went to see an FIT exhibit on “seduction”, then met up with Mary South and Ben to watch “Grizzly Man,” or as I call it, “The best unintentional comedy of all time.”
The next night, Mark and I got free tickets (courtesy of the Amazing Abby Wolbe) to see Shakespeare in the Park. This year, Anne Hathaway was starring in “12th Night.” Anne did a tolerable job, but the supporting cast was hilarious and carried the show. I gladly would have seen it again. Plus we were sitting behind Hugh Jackman and Anna Wintour. Anna and her partner have to be the most spectacularly dressed couple I’ve ever seen. After the show, we had to go do coding, and that was a bit difficult. Then I had to get up early the next day to meet with my recruiter. I was so out of it when I came back from my meeting that Mark and I decided to wisely take the day off, so we watched John Adams and kept things low.
On Saturday (June 13) Mark and I headed over to Williamsburg to eat dinner with my friend Patricia at a cute Mexican Restaurant called La Superior, then got ice cream with Mary South at Pennylicks.
Mark’s brother came into town on June 14th, and the atmosphere definitely changed. Mark’s brother, Anthony, is a very particular kind of man, very different from his brother in a lot of ways. I took the two of them to see “The Sting” on June 15th—sadly it drizzled throughout—but in general, I worked during the day doing odd jobs and polishing my resume, and they went into town and did their own thing.
On June 18th, I taped an interview section for a reality TV show called Love Taxi which one of my friends starred in. It was practically a gale on my way to the studio, so I have no doubt I look hideous. No one I know has seen the show, though, so I think I’m safe.
I worked at Wolford’s stuffing envelopes for a few days, and then on June 21, Anthony’s last day, we sent Anthony off to the airport, and got a big group of kids together (Alexis, Anna, Mary, Ben, and a few others I can’t remember) to head to Coney Island in the rain for the Mermaid festival. While the festival itself suffered because of the rain, I got a fried oreo out of the deal, which seemed pretty rad to me.
Mark’s last day was June 22, so we went out to an Italian restaurant (Marinella) and then went to Balthazar’s for dessert. The night was a bit odd for me, as I always get very sad when I get separated from Mark. But he was talking about how much he disliked the expense of the city and how Europe was better suited for his temperament, and I took it quite hard, as if it were an indictment of my life. In retrospect, I think it’s because I love living here so much, I’m dazzled by everything from Wall Street to Inwood, that anyone who isn’t similarly smitten seems to me to be of a different sort than I am. And I’ve always viewed Mark as the same sort as me. I think at the time I was reeling from all the ways he had changed, and I was beginning to worry that I had lost someone very precious in the course of this evolution.
The last week of June was spent recovering from the whirlwind that was Mark’s visit. I stayed in, saw High school musical with Anna (really, really bad guys), and did some coding work for “Toxic Avenger: The Musical” (I got to sit through the performance. It was very, very Troma. I also really, really don’t like musicals. I keep trying, it keeps failing to stick.) Finally, on June 30th, I head back to Dallas to spend a month with the fam.
JULY
“The ceaseless labor of your life is to build a house of death”-Montaigne
Back in Dallas, back with the fam. Benjamin came down on the 1st as well. I promised him that the next time I saw him, I would let him know whether or not we would have a future. After some extensive praying and reflecting, I came to the decision that we wouldn’t be good for each other long term. This was a very hard decision, because I don’t think anyone in a long, long time has loved me as much as Benjamin did. He would be a wonderful companion. In the end, I just felt that if we stayed together, he would lose himself in me, and he needs to find out what he loves, and who he is. I miss him very much; almost as soon as we broke up I started to miss him.
Of course, spending a month in a house with your ex isn’t the easiest, and my poor family suffered the most for the moodiness. We tried to keep everything light and low key, but we aren’t very good at that sort of thing.
On the 4th of July, my family went to the church pancake social, and took all of the uneaten pancakes home for an epic pancake fight (like a water balloon fight, but with pancakes). That night we watched Eagle vs. Shark, and for the first time in forever, didn’t light fireworks (which I think disappointed dad more than the kids).
Julia got a job at Potbelly’s, meaning she was our conduit for awesome sandwiches. Every day starting July 6th she would come home with an amazing sandwich and a cookie, and we would sit on my parents’ bed and watch Alias. It took us 2.5 weeks to go through all 5 seasons. It was pretty epic. It also gave us something to do while mom was in Paris visiting John and Margaret.
On July 8th I took Benji to the Coast Guard so he could see about enlisting. On July 11th my dad and I had a date night, where we went to see (the surprisingly bitter) “Whatever Works” and had dinner. My dad said he couldn’t have been more proud of me and the way I was living my life. That meant a lot.
July 12th my friend Tiffany Folger invited us to her house, where I think we were more than a little rude with our family’s pert opinions and lack of social manners. Tiffany took it in stride like a good friend, even though the rest of the guests seemed a little embarrassed. Afterwards we started a Harry Potter marathon, which we had to interrupt when one of our family members had a grand mal seizure during a scene with the patronus. Being that it’s out family, we rolled the person onto their side, let them foam onto the carpet, then tucked them into bed and continued to watch the movie. But don’t worry! A scan was administered the next day. We’re not completely heartless.
On July 17th we saw the new Harry Potter. As you’ll notice, there is a lot of movie watching that happens in Dallas.
On July 19th, Benji and I went on a date with Bonnie and Alan and our friend Michael. After dinner, we ate at Kathleen’s and talked about American foreign policy in the 19th century AS YOU DO. Benjamin made a lot of good points, only to reveal to me on the ride home he had cribbed all his arguments from They Might Be Giants lyrics.
The last week of July belonged to the Jones Family Reunion in Colorado. We started driving on July 22nd, stopped the night somewhere in Oklahoma or Kansas or something, then made it to Mary’s Lodge in Estes Park, CO (near Bolder) the next day. A complete Jones Family Reunion is a big deal, as there are 5 Aunts and Uncles + Their Spouses, then each family has on average 6.5 children, and nearly all of those children have a spouse, and then those families average about 3 children, so we’re dealing with roughly 150-200 people at these reunions. The first night was a Chuck Wagon dinner up in the mountains, where the children ran wild through Aspen trees and carried large sticks everywhere. The next day, July 24, I opt out of the hiking trip to get some work done for a new client, then join everyone in the hot tub later, only to discover I had taken my phone into the hot tub with me, and it was boiled beyond repair (Yes, I use my cleavage to hold things when I don’t have pockets. Losing phones is just one obvious downside of that questionable policy). We also had a large family dinner that night where everyone got to show off their talents, which mainly consisted of singing and performing in awkward yet funny skits.
On July 25th I went white water rafting with Julia, Jordan, and Benjamin. We lost Julia twice, but overall everything ran pretty smoothly, despite the fact that we were ill-equipped for such advanced rapids. Afterwards we went to the movie theater we rented and watched home movies. At some point the next day on the 26th we had a family game night led valiantly by my cousin Lauren. Apparently my mom and I have a ribald sense of humor that doesn’t mesh well with some of the more Utah-oriented members of the family, and we were the target of some nasty looks.
Once back in Dallas, I spent the rest of my time eating and watching Murder She Wrote with Julia. Nothing much to see here. On the plus side, my plane did get canceled, so I was able to spend another day with the family, which is always great. I wish they lived up here. It’s so hard to be far away from them.
AUGUST
“I *thought* you made love like an ugly girl. So present, so grateful” -30 Rock
On the plane back to New York, I read “Inside the Kingdom” by Carmen Bin Ladin which reassured me my plans to never, ever go to Saudi Arabia were in fact valid. For the first 2 weeks of August I worked alternately at an architecture firm doing accounting work and a financial advisory firm doing transcription and reception work. The work is low--$12 an hour—but to be honest, money is money, and I’ll do anything for it at the moment. A few days I’d have to do what I’d call triple shifts, where I work at my temp job, then go home and write for my freelance job, then go out and code until 4am, then go home and sleep 3 hours and go back to the temp job. Those were not the best days.
Discovered the following gems in the month of august:
1) Cake Wrecks (
http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/)
2) Highdeas (
www.highdeas.com)
3) Texts from Last night (
http://textsfromlastnight.com/)
4) Tattoo Fail (
http://tattoofailure.com/)
5) Awkward Family Photos (
http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/)
I’m sure you have all visited these websites, because they are simply divine, and no doubt all are developing book deals.
Around August 9th, the apartment drama started. Now, to be politic, I will say it this way: I perhaps overestimated my would-be roommates experience apartment hunting. SO rather than having 3 people look for an apartment, I ended up shouldering the lion’s share of the responsibility. So I would have to look at 4 or 5 apartments a day on top of my regular schedule. Dealing with Manhattan brokers was such a stress and filled with so much drama (seriously? 15% broker’s fee? Seriously? 200 square feet for 3 people?) that I decided to move out to Brooklyn. I found a perfect place on Bedford, but the company ended up dragging me along for almost 2 weeks until on August 18th they told me my credit wasn’t good enough. With 10 days to find an apartment, pack, and vacate my old one, I was pretty sure I was going to have a heart attack. Luckily, one of the apartments I had looked at on August 10th turned out to still be available since the landlord left on vacation shortly after she showed me the place. So on August 20th I was able to sign a lease for my 2 bedroom, $1850/month Williamsburg apartment.
In the middle of all of the apartment drama, my sister Margaret came out to Manhattan with her new husband, fresh from their 3-month long Parisian honeymoon. They seemed to be a bit dazed and confused from all of the traveling, so they pretty much took it easy and spent a lot of time on my bed watching the Venture Brothers and eating Mexican. We did manage to see Julia off at the airport, visit the Morgan Library (Aug 15th), eat at ‘wichcraft, eat at Grimaldi’s with Anna (Aug 16th), see David Cross and some other comedians at the UCB theatre (Aug 17th), eat at John’s with Sami (Aug 19th), and eat at Sylvia’s in Harlem with Brooke (Aug 20th). So yes, a lot of eating there.
Margaret and John left on July 21st, which gave me one day to rest before I led the enrichment activity to Egger’s ice cream parlor in Staten Island. Enrichment is a bit like Mormon home ec and night school all in one—a chance for Mormon women to get together and learn some sort of a new skill or bit of history. In New York, single women tend to travel to museums or explore the city. I was leading an exposition to the best malt shop and old school soda fountain in NYC. Now, ever since I boiled my phone in a hto tub, I had been using Margaret’s rejected phone, which she had tricked out with a truly awesome set of ringtones. Whenever anyone would call me, I would hear the Dallas theme song or Mortal Combat fight music, though usually Dallas. And what do I do on the Staten Island trip? Leave my phone on the bus. As soon as I step off I realize my mistake and chase it down, but too late, my phone is gone. I called the recovery center every 2 hours, but no one turned it in. And my replacement phone was totally not as cool, and it had no Dallas theme song. Devastating.
On Aug 30th, a very creepy set of Hungarian men moved us from Manhattan to Brooklyn, setting me back almost $550 dollars (though the job was estimated as $350. Cute!) But whatever. I was so happy to have the entire drama of moving over with that I didn’t care. Instead I ate bread and cheese and watched GATTACA with my roommates on a mattress on the floor.
SEPTEMBER:
“To be irreplaceable, one must be different”—Coco Chanel
The beginning of September was absolutely crazy. My mother arrive on September 1st to help me move in, and she was, as everyone was, completely overwhelmed with how much stuff I had. In response to that, I will claim that I am an adult woman who is nearly 30 who has lived alone in her own apartment for 3 years. What did everyone expect? So my mom and I got a little bit of headway putting stuff together and visiting Ikea and everything. And then my roommate Alexis’ mom came. And she had her own ideas about how everything should be arranged. And then Mark showed up, with a lot of things, and with his own idea about how the space should be laid out. And then my dad showed up, and he didn’t want to do any work at all, but wanted to go to fun restaurants and see the US Open. So we didn’t get a whole lot of work done after about September 5th. On my birthday (Sept 6th), we definitely did the nice restaurant thing: we went to Gordan Ramsey's Maze where I got tete de veau, rib eye, and cheesecake. Then I took my parents to the Morgan library so my mom could see their ceramics collection.
On September 7th, I went to the US Open with Mark and my parents. We got ground tickets, which let us see any game other than those in the Arthur Ashe Stadium. We saw Soderling and Davydenko play a good rally— Soderling had a wicked forehand, and Davydenko was unbelievably elegant. With the women, Kvitova versus Wickermeyer was a good show, though not as athletic because the women weren’t in as good of shape (potbellies? At the US open?) Kvitova threw her racket on the ground over a bad call, and the crowd booed her. When Wickermeyer went for a serve, a guy in the audience yelled 'you're my girl, blue!', which has to be one of the highlights of my young life. Saw a few doubles matches, which were fast and furious and a little eurotrash (silver chains and wrap-around glasses?). Back in the Billy Jean King arena with my parents, I got to see Isner and Verdasco play. Isner had defeated Roddick, so we were expecting something awesome, but he played like an awkward, gangly teen. Verdasco was a bit of a spitfire though. Towards the end of the match, Johnny Mac himself came into the stadium to comment on the match. He got a standing ovation.
On September 9th I flew down to Dallas to spend my birthday weekend with my family. I got to see my brother Zach play a tennis tournament with some lying, cheating kids (that was totally in, four-eyes!). Margaret was home for a few days, so it was nice to spend it with her.
On September 10th, I had my birthday with my family. As usual, my parents pick out the best presents: green dress shoes, perfect t-shirts, a beautiful tennis bracelet. I wish I could inherit my mother’s gift for present buying. It’s always a struggle for me. During my birthday weekend I got a call from one of my recruiters that I was in the running for a job at the firm EuroRCGS. Unlike other times when recruiters would call, I didn’t feel like this was a blow-off job—I felt a sick feeling like I might really get this job. And on September 11th I got the call that yes, I had indeed landed a 3-month stint with the company and I had to start Tuesday. This meant cutting off my Dallas trip a day early, but I was too thrilled to think of anything other than the chance to be working a real job.
The rest of my Dallas trip was pretty much a blur. On September 12th, I saw Julie and Julia with my mother. The next day, Tiffany came over to visit and we saw the Kanye West ruin his career at the VMAs. On September 14th, I flew back to Dallas, and the next day I was working at an amazing Madison Avenue company. I am officially a Mad Man. This is pretty much the greatest accomplishment I ever hope to achieve.
The only hitch in the perfection of working at Euro is the fact that nary a day before I heard about the job, I signed a contract to deliver 60 articles on Christmas Tree Ornaments by mid-October. So from September 15th until October 15th, I had to get up at 5:30, write articles for 2 hours, get ready for work, then go to work until 7 or 8, come home, sleep, and start the whole process over again. The sad thing is, the contract for those articles was worth about 2 days salary at Euro (4 days after tax), but the client is a very good returning client of mine, and I didn’t want to hurt our relationship. So if you didn’t hear from me between September 15th and October 15th, this is the reason why.
I did manage to get some fun things in though. On September 19th Mark and I went to a farmer’s market together, and wrote together at a local café with Mary South. Mary lives a block away from Mark and me, so we’re constantly running into each other in restaurants and cafés in Brooklyn. In that respect, Brooklyn is a lot like Evanston. If I could just get Nick, Adele, and Lakshmi to move out here, I’d be all set.
On September 20th Anna and I went to our dear friend’s Wanda and David’s reception. Wanda helped me get my job at Greater Than One and David worked with Anna at Wunderman. I had the victory of being able to casually mention to my old coworkers that yes in fact I was working at Euro as a SENIOR COPYWRITER. Snap!
On September 21st I took Mark to Bon Chon Chicken, then watched the Rachel Zoe project. I count it among my victories that Mark actually enjoys watching that show with me. Mark and I also started running the Williamsburg bridge around this time, which I ultimately gave up after 2 weeks because of A) articles and B) my weight. I need to get back down to at least 170 before I can safely run. AND YES I JUST ADMITTED TO WEIGHING MORE THAN 170 DON’T GASP I’M ALREADY ASHAMED.
The next day we went to Otto’s Shrunken Head for Marsha’s birthday, and I could barely walk, I was so sore from the run. The party was great though—Otto’s has a whole bunch of old-school punk regulars that are in their 50s and still sport the leather and the Mohawks. We saw some bad stand up which was funny in it’s terribleness, and managed to insult the MC by leaving every two seconds to get more drinks or use the photobooth.
On Saturday September 26th, I picked up Mary South and went over to Death By Audio where we met up with Mark and his friend Matt. The club was also a labyrinth that was kind of a haunted house but really an art installation. Everyone was very sweet, which is unusual in Brooklyn. The music was derivative Jersey punk, but we weren’t disappointed—we mostly were looking for an excuse to check out the venue. We got some burgers after, got into an unnecessarily long fight about who was more threatened walking around late at night, men or women. More rain.
The next day, I went to the Brooklyn Mormon Church for the first time. Afterwards, we invited over a girl named Liz and Mary South to dinner, then afterwards went to Mary’s house to see “Bored to Death.” It was pretty wonderful, and it reminded me of the dinner parties Mark and I used to throw in college. I think it’s very hard for me to live with Mark and not remember college. I’m trying to make sure that I allow for growth and change and all that, but sometimes I’m sitting with him and Mary South and I simply forget that any time has past, and I feel like I felt then. It’s an extraordinarily warm and pleasant feeling, being with old friends.
Monday, Mark went on his first date, an event by which I was completely blindsided. If there’s one thing that has changed from college, it’s writing intimate details about my romantic life in a public forum, so I will sum it up a very complex set of emotions by simply saying that I was very, very jealous. And because he’s my best friend, and because we live together, I had to get over that jealousy very, very quickly. I spent a lot of time out of the house or with friends, I avoided Facebook, I went to museums and concerts, and by the following Monday, I was fine.
As my last act in the month of September, my roommate Alexis and I went to the Met to see the New York Philharmonic play. The first piece was a completely banal piece by a contemporary composer named Lindberg—it sounded like a tired score to a mediocre move. Then we heard Symphony#2 by Charles Ives, which was hit or miss for me. It was a thoroughly American piece of music, so like America it had pockets of complexity, pockets of deep beauty, and large swaths of completely ho-hum open space. I adored the first movement though, as well as the chills-inducing finale. The Beethoven piece that rounded it out was good, but I spent most of the time spacing off and thinking about other things.
OCTOBER
“My boyfriend looks like gary glitter/ he likes punk rock but says glam is better”—Labretta Suede and the Motel 6
Most of October was spent alternating between pure moments of absolute clarity and more muddied moments of intense sadness and jealousy. I tried to explain some of what I was feeling on my October 2nd date with Mark, but I couldn’t do a very good job. But in the end, I’ve said so many awful things to him over the years with regards to our relationship and to him as a partner, I feel very much that I deserve to bite my tongue and sacrifice a certain amount of forthrightness for the sake of a beautiful friendship. I did manage to get a few things off my chest though, allowing us to enjoy the rest of the night (We saw the impeccable “Whip It.” And shame on you America for not supporting that movie: it was amazing).
That Saturday (3rd), I watched a bit of the National Parks documentary before heading over to a local BBQ joint with Mary South. For all of our disagreements and differences of opinion, she is always an uncommonly good friend to me when I need it.
On Monday, Mark got a call from a stranded New Zealand band who were holed up in a Williamsburg internet café. We spent some time talking to them, as Mark knew the drummer. You know how you take to some people right away? I completely took to Labretta Suede, the lead singer. She’s just a vibrant, sweet, strong woman with a killer look and a will of iron. I agreed to go check out her show that week.
On my way to Labretta’s show on Thursday (Oct 7th) I popped into the bathroom after work to put on my war paint (it is, after all, a punk pyschobilly band. I can’t really show up in my work makeup). I had a totally high school moment where I, my project manager, and my accounts manager were all at the sink getting our night hair and makeup ready before going out on the town. This was kind of a poignant moment for me: like “A ha! I’ve really made it!” Walked on over to The Delancey to check out the show. The first band was called Food Stamps. Their music was ok, but I think the most important things about food stamps can be summed up as followed:
1) Dancing Centurion
2) Singer with the world’s sexiest legs
No seriously, I mean perfect, long, absolutely amazing legs. They went on forever. I was completely transfixed.
Labretta showed up in fishnets, a corset, pasties, and a headdress—pretty much head to toe the rock god. And man, was she ever the front woman: kicking and shrieking and screaming and dancing. There are singers and then there are performers, and Labretta is a performer. That isn’t to say she can’t sing—she’s got a sexy alto with a nice growl—but man, she puts on a show. I was so inspired I went out and bought myself a leather jacket the next night. Seriously. Everyone hates it but me, but then again, I’ve been dreaming about a studded leather jacket since I was 8, and now my fantasies have all come true.
That Friday (Oct 9th) I met up with Alexis and Veronica to go see the new American Wing at the Met. The problem with going to Met on any day is the high level of distractions one experiences. For example, our destination was the Robert Frank exhibit, then the new American wing. On the way to the (very lackluster) Robert Frank collection, I got distracted by some of Ingres sketches. Then, after the photography exhibit, I got sucked into the Rodin hallway and Veronica got lost among the pre-Raphaelites. Then on the way to the American wing I got distracted by the contemporary Surface Tension collection, the renaissance intarsia masterpiece that is the Gubbio Studiolo, and a fair amount of tile work. Luckily, we did make it to the American wing before the museum closed, and managed to walk through a Victorian panorama and a Lloyd-Wright living room.
Saturday the 10th, Marsha and I went into midtown to do some goth dancing. I was sick of living in a constant state of jealousy, I was tired of being single, tired of getting up at 5 every morning, and I really wanted to hook up, so the whole night seemed like a pretty good idea. Marsha hadn’t had a great day either, so she pre-gamed with tequila and I took some 5-hour energy shots and we were good to go. I took a lesson from Lady GaGa and wore fake eyelashes, kabuki makeup, knee high boots, and fishnets with no pants. Yet somehow, the outfit was still garment-appropriate. Quite genius, really. The club was packed, and since it was a costume party, the outfits were pretty outrageous. The music wasn’t as dark as I would have liked, but it wasn’t bad either—dance remixes of ministry and new order, etc. Cage dancing, table dancing, stage dancing, glow-stick dancing…we rocked until well into 4am, then Marsha and I split a taxi back to Brooklyn.
Mark was spending the night at his girlfriend’s place, so I took off my boots and fell in full makeup onto his bed and slept in. It was the first time I’ve missed church in ages, but I’d been working so hard I decided I needed a day off. I got myself a drink, turned some music on, and had my own dance party in the living room for an hour or two. Going to a club and dancing for 5+ hours is a really liberating experience, and for some reason I always leave feeling sexy and alive, more in tune with my physical body. Mark came back from his overnight stay, and I followed him to the store where he bought ingredients for Sunday dinner.
The rest of the week was spent furiously trying to finish ornament articles. On Monday (Oct 12th) Mark and I went to see Paranormal State. Good, scary enough, but not as complex as it could have been. Still! Very entertaining. Than on October 15th I reported for jury duty, which lasted all of 2 seconds before I was dismissed. I will say this to you, New York City judicial system: your supreme court has excellent security, everyone s very competent, and the murals are beautiful.
Now, this brings us to October 16th, the beginning of my trip to Chicago for Adele’s wedding. This deserves it’s own post. In the interim, I will say simply: you’re welcome
Labels: Recap, work